The End or the Beginning?

Good morning! Long time, no talk–unless you follow my Facebook Page–which if you don’t, you definitely should! In fact, I’ve got a Proverbs challenge going on right now on the page. I’d love to have you join in with us!

The end of the year craziness has definitely kept me busy, and this year, our son , Chaz, is graduating from high school. He has kept us VERY busy. We are having a graduation party for him, and two of his cousins who are also graduating, today. You should have heard the lady at Dillons when I ordered the cake and handed her a picture of them. She thought they all belonged to me and were triplets! Ha! I know they have enjoyed going to school together and having cousins in their class. All that will be left of the Melugin cousins next year is poor, little Harley. She kind of wishes she could just skip senior year!

Obviously, I’ve been thinking a lot about Chaz graduating, and people are really curious about how I’m feeling about it. I guess that is a normal question for someone who has their oldest child graduating. This is a first for us. I think the girls I coach have taken bets on whether I will or will not cry at the graduation (which is next Saturday). They also claim that if the tears don’t fall, it doesn’t count. Tearing up won’t cut it, according to them.

My answer about how I’m feeling has always been the same.

I’m excited.

To understand that response, you might need a little (or a long) back story…

Over the years, we have always told Chaz and Harley to get good grades. Do well in school and you can go to the local junior college for free. You need to get scholarships because we are not paying for your college. I know some will disagree with that and think we should have been preparing by setting up a college fund, but Marc and I have always wanted our children to be invested in what they have. That meant no fancy, new cars would be bought by us. We helped them buy a 1980 Camaro and a 1985 Chevy, spending a total of about $150 of our money (I think). Phones? You’ll pay for those too. College education? We are not the ones who will profit from that, and we felt that if they were invested in it, they would be more likely to take it seriously and work hard at it. Honestly, we’ve just seen too many kids bounce around from college to college, or major to major, or just drop out, or graduate and not use their education. Please understand, this is just our opinion and we do not judge others who take a different approach with their kids.

So when we talked about college, it was always you’ll start at Butler (the local junior college) unless you have a full-ride somewhere else OR you feel called to go to Bible college. We always included that option because we wanted them to know it something to be considered, and we would support them if God called them into the ministry.

A couple of years ago, Harley (yes, she is our soon to be Senior–it will make more sense later on) surrendered her life to the ministry. She wasn’t (and still isn’t) sure of the exact area of service, but she knew she was supposed to go to Heartland Baptist Bible College. When she told me that, I will admit that I went through a time of questioning. Heartland is not an accredited school, and I understand why, but it makes getting scholarships a lot more difficult. It also means no student loans (which is really a good thing in the end). It meant no FREE college at Butler. Now we knew we would have to help pay for her college, but we also knew we had some time to prepare. I was a little worried that we might send her there and she would change her mind. Maybe God hadn’t called her after all… Wouldn’t that be a waste of money? As I prayed about this–wrestled with it, honestly–I came to the conclusion that she would not be spiritually worse off for going to Heartland. And that was our biggest concern. Not her finances. Not her career. Those things would work out. If she changed her mind, she may have to invest more time and money at another college, but that would be up to her. We just needed to be prepared to help her do what God called her to do.

Chaz was going to be a doctor. He wasn’t sure what specific field, but was wavering between a surgeon and something else I can’t pronounce. 😉 He had been interested in the medical field for at least three years and was taking classes like A&P to prepare. The ministry was not in his plans and that was okay with us. We just wanted him to do what God wanted him to do.

Last year about this time, we were dealing with some issues with Chaz. I won’t go into details. It was nothing horrible. But it was enough that we were concerned. His heart wasn’t right with the Lord or with us. We were praying the Lord would get a hold of his heart and mold him into the young man He wanted him to be.

Chaz went to summer camp and a missions trip last summer. He also had some heart issues that were concerning us. On that missions trip, he ended up in the hospital in New Mexico. Marc and I were not with him–that was tough for this mom! I may have shed some real tears (the kind that counted) over not being there for him. Anyway, it was then and there that he admitted the Lord had been speaking to him concerning the ministry. He began seriously considering going to Bible college and majoring in music (his passion). However, as school started, he began to question that and being a doctor was being considered again. He felt like he needed to know what he was going to do and wanted to have a specific plan. That reflects his personality, but also, I think he felt pressure as the valedictorian of his class to KNOW what he was going to do. We were willing to support him with whatever he decided. I even planned to visit Kansas University with him so we could have a transfer plan in place from Butler. But…he was still not sure. As a mom, I knew he was wrestling with the calling on his life. We prayed. We encouraged him to seek counsel from our youth pastor and pastor. We told him to just obey–one step, or one year, at a time. He didn’t have to know what he was supposed to do for the rest of his life!

I cannot tell you exactly what happened–that will be part of his testimony someday–but one day after church he said, “I’m supposed to go to Heartland.” And that was that. I cannot even begin to explain the difference in him after that day. It was as if a burden had been lifted. He began to mature and grow spiritually. It has been amazing to witness, truthfully! I began to watch my shy, introverted kid spread his wings a bit…get out of his comfort zone and talk to people, to sing (instead of just hide behind the piano), to be a witness to his friends, to GROW.

That is why I’m excited! I’m excited to see what God has planned for his life!

Yes, our college funds dilemma had gotten a whole lot bigger–and sooner than we were expecting! However, I know that if the Lord has called my children to the ministry, He will make a way for us to pay for college. We–all of us, kids included–are working hard to save money and we have already seen some blessings from the Lord.

All of that to say…this may be the end of Chaz’s high school career, but it is only the beginning! May he continue to follow the Lord’s leading in his life…every step of the way!